Category Archive: Lola

Last days in the Bay Area…

Words cannot quite describe what the Bay Area has meant to Kevin and me. Our relationship with each other grew deeply being on our own, fending for ourselves and making new friends, exploring an amazing group of communities, growing our family with adopting Lola and having Sirena…the list goes on and on. The decision to move back to Long Beach was one of the hardest things we’ve had to do. To be honest, if it weren’t for having Sirena, wanting her to know her family really well, and having the promise of HELP close at hand we probably would not have moved back at least so soon. There was still so much for us to do and experience up there! But reality won out and in the end we were very happy and at peace with our decision. It was just such a hard thing to decide on and work through until it was said and done.

We enjoyed one last “hurrah” with my sister Jessie–a day trip to Albany Bulb for a little hike and cuddles (Jessie and Sirena of course) on a blanket overlooking the bay.

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Some final photos of our apartment before we completely tore it apart with packing for the big move!

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Family photos on our air-mattress-turned-couch after we sold our couch a couple of weeks before the move. 😉

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Kevin’s family (Dorothy, Judith, and Joshua) made the drive up to help us watch Sirena, pack the van, and caravan back down to Long Beach. What an amazing group of people!! Unfortunately I didn’t get one photo of them!

The joint all packed up…

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Just looking at this photo makes me shudder!

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All of our furniture lined up down the hallway of our apartment building.

Just before we drove off in the moving truck we took some photos of Auntie Jessie with her favorite girls: Sirena and Lola. The relationship that our girls have with Jessie is indescribable and irreplaceable.

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A week of firsts

Even though it seems that every one of the blog posts recently have been about “Sirena’s first [insert something cool here]”, we had one full week of pretty exciting “firsts” that deserves its own post…

First trip to the zoo

I’m sure the words “Oakland” and “Zoo” together don’t conjure up visions of really cool animals but, surprisingly, the Oakland Zoo is quite the zoo!  We met up with my co-worker Debra and her 18 month old son Cruz for a visit to the park and we’re so glad we went!

Getting ready for her first safari

The gang ready to see some animals!

Sirena and Cruz, the little buddies

Happy mama, daddy and baby

Kevin, Debra and the kiddos walking through the park

We saw so many cool animals!  Like a mama and baby giraffe…

Me and my baby with the mama and baby giraffes in the background (awww…)

And a lion!  Apparently this guy never comes out into the open and we happened to be there in the 2 minutes he left his little enclosure…lucky us!

That zebra musta been real scared

Pumba was there

And so was this handsome fella

And this crazy monkey who was putting on a good show for us

We visited the fruit bat enclosure and got up-close-and-personal with some kinda cute/kinda creepy creatures.

Sirena wasn’t too impressed with the bats as you can see here

After all of the animals it was time for a break!

Is he not the cutest thing ever?

A tired and very full baby getting burped by daddy

Family photo outside of the flamingo enclosure

The Oakland Zoo is a gem in the middle of this big city and we would highly recommend it!

First college campus tour

We took Sirena on her very first college campus tour at UC Berkeley (it’s never too early to start, right??)  I have been wanting to go for a long walk on Cal’s campus since before my maternity leave started and I was so glad we finally did it.  Too bad the weather wasn’t spectacular that particular day but that didn’t keep us from having a good time.

It was chilly that day so we put on her going-home-from-the-hospital beanie and it made her look like a brand-speankin’-new baby again

Lola didn’t have to wear any sort of hat with that gorgeous fur coat of hers

Lola going for a stroll with good ol’ “Pappy” (Kevin and I are weird, what can we say?)

This face can only mean one thing…dirty diaper!

And what better place to change a dirty diaper?  On the bench in front of some old building on the campus, of course!

I couldn’t resist taking this picture, it looks like the Invisible Baby or something (I know, I’m a dork)

One of my favorite things about this campus is The Campanile

Sirena with The Campanile in the background (if she ends up going to Cal I think it would be awesome to take a similar picture of her standing in this spot on her first day there. Gah, I’m such a mom.)

First concert

We made it back to Stern Grove for one of the free summer concerts and once again it did not disappoint!  Jess and I went to a Stern Grove concert my first weekend living in San Francisco in 2009 (see post here) and Kevin, Lola and I went with some friends last year (see post here) and I had been looking forward to taking Sirena to see the band Ozomatli before she was born. We met up with Jessie who snagged a great spot right in front and hung out with some of her friends that afternoon.

As new parents we naively brought S to the concert without having thought through how to protect her tiny little ears and we were prepared to sit away from Jess and her group to keep S far from the speakers but luckily the Red Cross booth had ear plugs that we could use and they seemed to do the trick!

Happy baby getting ready for the concert to start!

Ma and Pa enjoying a baby-free moment while Aunt Jessie was dancing with S

Mama dancing with Sirena

Here are two short videos of Sirena dancing with me and dancing with Aunt Jessie (notice how deep asleep she is in both videos even with all the ruckus going on)!

Sirena’s first trip to Long Beach

Since before Sirena was born we were planning on making a trip down south when she was one month old so that she could meet family and close friends and so that we could have a nice little vacation while we were both off of work.  We were playing it by ear up until the week before we left just in case it didn’t work out (either because I hadn’t recovered fully or if she wasn’t able to travel) and we were so happy that it worked out just as we had hoped!

Traveling with an infant was…different.  Our car was packed to the brim with mostly stuff for Sirena and Lola barely fit in the backseat with her!  Usually when we drive down to LB we can make it down in 6 hours but with having to stop to feed her or change her diaper it took us 8 hours total, which actually isn’t terrible but it was definitely a lot longer than we’re used to.  Breastfeeding her in the backseat in parking lots was a different experience but luckily we made it work and the little girl didn’t starve.  🙂

We got to see the majority of our family in Southern California and some close friends but weren’t able to see everyone we had hoped to see but hopefully within the next couple of visits she’ll be able to meet everyone!  Here are the highlights of our trip…

Meeting family

One person I was extremely excited to meet Sirena was my Aunt Tina and she just fell in love with her.  🙂

Meeting for the first time!

Second time seeing each other

Meeting her grand uncle Joey (and rockin’ the no-pants look)

Seeing her Uncle Derek again

With her Nani

Hanging out with Nani and Auntie Tina

Three generations

The whole gang (minus Steve who was taking the photo!)

She also got to meet the rest of the Edmonds family…

With her big cousin Katelyn!

Auntie Judith was head over heels in love with the little lady

Aunt Sarah was so in love too!

Sirena got a double whammy when she met Uncle Thomas and her cousin Sophie

Kisses from Sophie

And Sirena experienced her first play date while in Long Beach with Kim’s daughter Amelia and Shani’s daughter Sadie…

Kevin and the Mommy group!

Sirena with her Auntie Kim

Dance party with Amelia!

Sirena meeting Sadie for the first time

Tummy time with Sadie (it’s amazing how much stronger Sadie is and only three months older than Sirena)

Meeting friends and exploring Mom & Dad’s hometown

Our close friends Brianne and Brian were so excited to meet Sirena…

Their first meeting!

Whatchu lookin’ at?

Playing tennis the morning of July 4th

Brianne, Brian and Brian’s sister Lisa just staring at the baby

Kevin and his floating baby (and Lola too!)

We had a little gathering in San Pedro so that some of my close family friends could come and meet our little munchkin…

Diane is like a second mom to me and it was so great having her meet Sirena!

Dave, Diane’s husband–he’s known my mom since she was 15 years old

Meeting Don and Rosemary

It was also a time to celebrate the birthdays of my mom, Don and Rosemary!

And lastly, it happened to be our six year wedding anniversary–it was hard to believe that six years prior we were in the same city getting married and we only dreamed of starting a family together.  Now six years later we were able to celebrate with our little lady!

Sirena and Mama, mirror images of each other

Random photos from our trip…

My mom’s boyfriend Steve recently purchased a ’51 Chevy and he said that we could take it out for a spin which Kevin was beyond happy to take him up on!

Lookin’ good!

Checking out his lovely backseat passenger 😉

The gang

The boys

It was SO hot and humid compared to the Bay Area and Sirena had a hard time adjusting (she even developed a small heat rash, poor thing) so she spent a lot of time lounging in nothing but a diaper!

Trying to adjust to all that darn sunshine!

With Mama at Brianne’s bridal shower

The four of us (with Lola) spent some time at a park in Pasadena on the way to dinner at Sarah’s house and here are some photos from our afternoon there…

Flying high with the help of Dad

Baby photo shoot

She’s such a little stinker

Kisses from Dad

Getting lots of love from Mama

Those feet love the feeling of grass

::Yawn:: Tired little baby

We also spent a lot of time just hanging out at Kevin’s parent’s house where we were staying while in town.  Their backyard garden was a lot of fun to hang out in and Sirena enjoyed looking at the flowers and the vegetable garden so much…

Taking in the sights of the garden with Mama

Nothing like a nap in the great outdoors!

Saying bye to our family and friends this trip was by far the hardest in the three years we’ve lived in the Bay Area…things sure do change when a baby enters your life.  We had a really great time even though it went by way too quickly and we didn’t get to see nearly enough people!  Until next time…

Life with Sirena: Weeks 3 and 4

Things seemed to change dramatically after the first two weeks but thinking back on it now I think it had less to do with Sirena and more to do with me and Kevin just getting the hang of things!  Quite a few people reached out to me after reading my last post about my experience with the “baby blues” and I appreciate it so much.  Although it was hard to write and even harder to post for everyone to read, it felt really good to be so honest about it and to receive such positive feedback from moms and future mamas alike.

I wanted to share with all those future mamas out there that one of the things that helped me the most was reading the book The Happiest Baby on the Block. Although the book focuses mostly on how to calm a fussy baby and how to help relax and put a baby to sleep, what I found most helpful was reading about a newborn’s development.  I had heard before that the first three months of life are considered the “fourth trimester” but I never understood exactly what that meant and the author, Dr. Karp, explained it extremely well (and much better than I’m about to do, I guarantee that)…he says that babies younger than three months old can still be considered fetuses because they have not finished developing and still need 24/7 attention.  They were so used to living in the womb where their every need was met on demand (eating, warmth, movement, being held tightly) and after birth they’re still in need of those things all the time.  Reading this helped me understand a lot about her and her needs and it helped me to understand why my sole job right now is to take care of her.  This understanding has helped me immensely!

In other news, we had her first appointment with the pediatrician on June 18 and she weighed in at a whoppin’ 8 lbs, 14 oz and measured the same as she did at birth at 19.5 inches.  The doctor said that everything looks good and that we’ve got a healthy baby on our hands!

We continued to keep ourselves mighty busy the last half of her first month including a visit from her Grandma Dorothy and celebrating Kevin’s first Father’s Day!  Pictures of our adventures…

A hike at Sibley Volcanic Regional Preserve in Oakland

First time baby-wearing for me and I loved it!

Sirena’s first-ever visit to San Francisco!

Me and the little Bay Area native looking out on the bay

A not-so-happy bather

Preparing for a dip in the bathtub

Not digging this experience in the least

“Quit taking pictures and dry me off NOW!”

Tummy time!

Tummy time is a really important part of a newborn’s development to help them strengthen their neck muscles and practice keeping their heads up. She likes it for a couple of minutes but then won’t hesitate to let us know that she is very unhappy and wants to get off her tummy as soon as possible!

A hike in Glen Canyon in San Francisco (Mom and Dad’s old stompin’ grounds!)

After the hike we spent some time sitting in the grass and taking in the sunshine…

What day at the park would be complete without a showing of Kevin and Lola’s tricks?

Some more random photos from these two weeks…

A naked, sleeping baby…could life get any better than this?

Hanging out at Auntie Jessie’s apartment

Getting to know her cousin Mars

Me and my girls

Kevin and his lounging “beach bum”

Sirena and Mama

Grandma Dorothy’s visit

Grandma Dorothy came up to visit for a few days to spend some more time with her fourth grandchild (oh yeah, and us too 😉 ).

We spent one day at the Berkeley Rose Garden and Codornices Park across the street (the last time we went to these two places was back in 2010 when Kevin’s brother Thomas came to visit, see post at this link).

Notice Lola’s photo bomb? Haha, that girl is such a ham.

We also spent an afternoon at Joaquin Miller Park in Oakland to hang out and play frisbee with Lola…

Ready for some sunshine!

Me and Dorothy chatting while Sirena napped the afternoon away

This girl makes sleeping look so good…

Big foot!

Kevin’s first Father’s Day was spent at the botanic gardens at Tilden Regional Park in Berkeley at Kevin’s request.  We packed a picnic lunch and enjoyed the beautiful gardens together.

Chow time!

Sirena napped in her stroller while we had our picnic lunch

Then it was time for our hike…

Kevin and Dorothy

The gardens had TONS of stairs so Kevin and I had to carry the stroller quite a bit, haha.  And we quickly realized that we definitely need an off-road stroller (which we’ve since gotten, hallelujah!)

Beautiful trees in the garden

Diaper duty for Kevin on Father’s Day!

Happy girl with a clean booty

Papahood sure looks good on Kevin, wouldn’t you say?

I have to admit, saying the words “Happy Father’s Day” to Kevin for the first time that day was the sweetest thing!

And some final random photos from Grandma’s visit…

The three of us hanging out in her room on the glider

Kisses for my Buddha baby and her giving me a goofy grin right back!

It’s so apparent that Grandma has so much love for this little lady (wearing her “Grandma gives the best hugs” onesie for the occasion!)

And finally some short videos of Sirena in action to close this post out!

Sirena making some funny faces at me here

Getting kisses from Lola during a car ride here

Me trying to wake The Grump up here

Sirena’s first two weeks

Sirena’s first days of life

A few hours after Sirena was born, we made the trip upstairs to the Family Recovery Room to spend the next two nights getting to know our baby and preparing to go home as new parents.  Over the course of the next 48 hours we spent a lot of time visiting with the family that was in town, trying to get as much sleep as possible which proved to be almost impossible with the constant feeding, changing of diapers (which Kevin did completely while in the hospital, I didn’t have to change a diaper until we got home!), and the constant interruption by nurses and doctors coming in to check in on us, and just being in complete and total awe of the little lady we had created.

My first experience in a wheelchair and I couldn’t have asked for a better chair mate!

Skin-to-skin with mama

Hanging out with mom and dad (and Uncle Derek who came for a surprise visit!)

Love

Sirena was surrounded by lots of loving family members who couldn’t wait to get their paws on her–she was rarely laying down in the bassinet but instead almost always in someone’s arms!

Proud first-time grandma

Kevin and his mom (I love this picture!)

Such a happy Grandpa!

Enjoying time with Grandpa George and showing off those expressive little hands

Getting the special treatment by Aunt Jessie

Uncle Derek made a surprise visit to the hospital on the afternoon of the day she was born–someone knocked on the door and, thinking it was another nurse checking in on us, I told them to “come in” and I was speechless when I saw Derek walk in the door!  Turns out he happened to have an ultimate frisbee tournament in Santa Cruz that weekend so made the drive up to visit with us for a couple of hours before going back.  It was so wonderful having him there to meet his first niece!

The Delmars

The Edmonds

Sirena actually had to have a minor medical procedure done while still at the hospital–I was experiencing a lot of pain while breastfeeding and the nurses who observed me just said that Sirena had a strong latch but that eventually it’d get better.  When I began bleeding and the pain, in fact, did not stop we asked to meet with a Lactation Consultant to see if she could help.  She first observed Sirena nurse and then took a look inside her mouth and said that she believed her frenulum (the membrane that attaches the tongue to the floor of the mouth) was shorter than usual which did not allow her to breastfeed very efficiently.  She told us about the simple procedure of cutting the frenulum and after we said it would interest us she had the attending pediatrician come to our room to check her out.  The doctor agreed that cutting the frenulum would be beneficial and gave us the consent forms for the procedure.  It was surreal having to read through medical paperwork and sign off on something for another human and not myself.  Once the paperwork was signed and the doctor was getting ready I was overcome with some pretty intense emotions–whenever I had heard moms say that they couldn’t stand seeing their child get a shot I really couldn’t understand why something like that could be so dramatic, and yet here I was with a one day old baby who was going to get a very minor medical procedure done and I was overcome with sadness and I began to cry.  I felt so bad for this little person and I couldn’t help feeling guilty, questioning our decision to do this if it was only for a selfish reason (so that I wouldn’t be in pain while breastfeeding).  I couldn’t stand to watch the 2-second procedure and felt awful when I heard her little cry after it was done.  Luckily her cries only lasted for 30 seconds and she barely bled at all but it was the first time I truly understood those other moms and the overwhelming feelings of wanting to protect my baby from any little harm.

The hospital commissioned a photography company to drop by to meet with the new families to take baby’s first photos–although we didn’t order any from the company we did take advantage of the trance-like state the photographer put Sirena in so that I could snap a few posed newborn photos of our own!

Our itty bitty model

Sirena’s first glamor shot

Daddy and Sirena

Our last night at the hospital we got the extra special treatment with a meal fit for a royal family.  Kevin and I had placed our order the previous day so were looking forward to the dinner but when another huge tray showed up covered with five servings of desserts and Martinelli’s sparkling apple cider we were blown away–they not only prepared dessert for Kevin and me but for my mom, her boyfriend Steve, and my sister Jessie who happened to be visiting during that time as well!

The feast (with the guest of honor)!

And here’s a short video of the three of us hanging out in the hospital together

Life with a newborn

Bringing Sirena home

On Monday morning after meeting with countless medical professionals and attending the hospital discharge class it was finally time to go home.  I hadn’t set foot outside of the recovery room for 48 hours so it was strange not only to be going home with a new sidekick but also just to be outside of those four walls in general!  The weather had changed dramatically that day–it had rained early that morning and it was so windy, it reminded us of some tropical location.  She couldn’t have asked for more dramatic coming-home weather!

Proud new daddy

Soothing herself on mom’s finger for her first ever car ride…she was a total champ!

We were both excited and anxious about Sirena’s and Lola’s first encounter.  Lola had been without mom and dad for three days so we decided to leave Sirena out in the hallway with my mom while Kevin and I went into the apartment to greet our overly-excited pup.  It was so apparent she missed us a ton while we were gone and it was so great getting to see her again!  After a few minutes it was time for the long-awaited first meeting: here’s a short video of the two of them being introduced! Lola was extremely curious about the new little person (if she even recognized that Sirena was a little human) and just wanted to sniffsniffsniff her.  We had to tell her to “leave it” when she started getting a little too carried away with wanting to give her kisses but overall Lola did great at their first meeting!

Her first week

Sirena’s first week at home was a whirlwind.  Kevin and I were busy trying to figure out this whole newborn thing and getting used to our new sleep schedule.  We had the company of my mom and Steve for a couple of days at home which was nice to have some companionship and some extra hands to hold her while we tried to get things taken care of.

The only thing we had to do that week was go to our first doctor’s appointment with a Lactation Consultant on the day after we got home from the hospital.  The LC we met with was fantastic and gave me a lot of support and an extra boost of confidence.  Sirena at first weighed in at 7 lbs, 7 oz and after nursing her for 20 minutes she was weighed again and gained almost an entire ounce!  The LC scheduled us for another appointment the following week and said that it was her hope that Sirena gain at least 4 oz within the week.

Here are some snapshots from her first week at home:

Three generations

So itty bitty in her car seat!

My Aunt Tina bought Sirena a cute little Minnie Mouse outfit and a ton of Disney dolls so we wanted to take advantage and take a cute photo reminiscent of E.T.:

Let’s play “Where’s Sirena?”

Napping with Dad (check out the arm positions for both of them…)

Kevin and I made sure to get out of the house as much as possible to enjoy the outdoors and the sunshine instead of being cooped up in the house all day long.  Our first excursion when she was five days old was to Piedmont Park for a nice walk with Lola–while pregnant with Sirena I would take Lola here just about once a week so it was crazy being there with a little baby in tow!

Kevin and his girls

Sleepy baby

Lola checking out the munchkin Dad was carrying around

Her second week

We kept ourselves pretty busy her second week with visitors (Carleigh, Terri & Scott, and Darinee & Harrison came by for visits), a doctor’s appointment, a postpartum doula appointment, and excursions around town.

The doctor’s appointment we had was with the same Lactation Consultant we had seen the week prior–the first thing she did was weigh Sirena and when she found out she weighed 8 lbs, 4 oz (up 13 oz from the week before) the LC said, “Good job, mama! That’s all I needed to know, you’re doing a great job and you can go home now!”  It seems that Sirena and I are a pretty good team when it comes to this breastfeeding business.  🙂

One of the days that week we took a nice long walk to the Lake Merritt farmer’s market.  Since dogs aren’t allowed in the market I sat in the shade with our girls while Kevin went around to get some food–there was a man with his one year old daughter who stopped by to see the little baby in the stroller, he asked me how old she was and when I told him 7 days old he said, “You gave birth a week ago?!”  😉

On the walk home we stopped by the lake to take some photos…

Lola checking in on her sister

Kevin and his three girls

And here are some random photos from the week…

Little Buddha baby (check out those legs!)

She’s such a GRUMP when she wakes up!  We love it.

A visit from Auntie Carleigh (who is expecting two boys in a few months, Sirena’s future buddies!)

At the Oakland Rose Garden

Trying out Dad’s shades

And a little bit about postpartum recovery

With all of the preparation I did for the birth itself I wasn’t quite prepared for the moments and the days after the birth.  Other than a co-worker telling me about her own experience the two days in the hospital after her daughter was born, no one really talked to me about the recovery so I thought I’d mention it briefly here.

Like I mentioned in my previous post with her birth story, the moment she was placed on my chest was incredible.  She was so warm and so big and so unbelievably cute and I just could not believe that she was real and that she actually came out of me.  I was very much focused on her little face and her huge presence but something else was demanding my focus: being stitched up by the doctor.  Turns out I had a second degree tear (which is pretty typical for a woman’s first vaginal delivery) and because I didn’t have an epidural, even though she applied a local anesthetic I was still very aware of the sensations of the stitching while it was happening.  It actually took around 30 minutes for the doctor to finish and it was a lot more painful and uncomfortable than I could have imagined.  Even though I was in quite a bit of pain, during this time I was very much focused on Sirena and I actually gave her the nickname “Honey bear” to comfort her when she would cry or whimper.  I had never thought of that nickname prior to this experience so I consider it extremely special for the two of us and I find myself calling her that now when she’s in the most distress.

Another thing I hadn’t really expected was when I went to use the restroom for the first time about an hour after she was born, Kevin accompanied me and when I got up I told him I was feeling dizzy and placed my arms around his neck and the next thing I knew I woke up on the bathroom floor with a nurse looking over me.  I had fainted because I had lost so much blood (not any more than expected for a vaginal birth but way more than I had ever lost before!) and thank goodness Kevin was there to help lay me on the floor so I didn’t hit my head.  From then on I had to wear a “Fall Risk” bracelet on my wrist and the nurses were extra cautious of me getting up for any reason.  I also had a hard time urinating and ended up having to get a catheter put in for an entire evening–the worst part about this was that the nurse couldn’t put it in so had to ask the head nurse to come in and help her and she also had a hard time putting it in so for about 30 minutes total I had two nurses pricking me in a very sensitive area which I had definitely not anticipated.  Once the catheter was in I felt a huge relief so it was definitely worth it but it was a very trying time while they were putting it in.

More than anything, what I had the hardest time with in terms of recovery was the fact that I was so extremely weak.  I had never even broken a bone before so being in a hospital and actually having to recover and needing nurses to take care of me was very difficult for me.  I couldn’t do a lot of things for myself and I had a hard time letting go and being okay with nurses helping me with some very personal and uncomfortable things like assisting me in the restroom, emptying the catheter, etc.  I now have so much more respect for nurses and all they have to do for their patients having been one myself!  The first two weeks at home were pretty rough with my recovery as well but each day I would feel more and more normal and now that we’re almost one month from her birthday I am feeling about 95% back to normal.

The “baby blues”

Yup, I experienced them.  I struggled with deciding whether or not to include anything about this on the blog but I decided to be honest and share my experience because it seems that it isn’t always talked about and I want other new moms who have experienced them or women who may experience them in the future know that they’re not alone.

The first two weeks were…rough.  Adjusting to life with a newborn was not easy in the slightest, just like everyone had said (but I didn’t truly understand until I was living it!)

Lack of sleep + constant discomfort/pain from recovery + feeding Sirena every 1-3 hours all day long + crazy postpartum hormones = a not-always-happy mama.  I had a hard time accepting the fact that the independence I had once enjoyed every day was now completely gone.  When Sirena was hungry (like I said, every 1-3 hours all day long), I was needed right this instant.  Sleep was constantly being interrupted by a need to breastfeed and/or change a diaper–she’d wake up 2-3 times during the night and be awake for at least one hour at a time.  Our daily schedule was completely flipped on its head and we weren’t getting out of the house and seeing the light of day until around 2pm each day.  My body was no longer my own (not just in terms of breastfeeding but with the recovery too) and I just didn’t feel normal anymore.

All of these things added up to make me feel, in a word, drained.  Even though I genuinely enjoyed so many moments with my new little family there were many moments when I felt inadequate for not knowing what to do at all times, I felt selfish for wanting more sleep and wanting to not breastfeed and wanting my old life back, and more than anything, I felt guilty for having these feelings.  I have wanted to be a mom for a long time–I am great with kids and had expected mamahood to be something I would be a natural at.  So when my first two weeks as a mom turned out to be extremely difficult, I began feeling like maybe I wasn’t cut out for being a mom after all and that was the worst feeling to have.

So what helped me snap out of this?  First of all, Kevin was amazing throughout this experience.  He allowed me to crycrycry it out, he was extremely supportive and was constantly telling me that I was, in fact, doing a good job and that it was okay and normal for me to feel the way I was feeling, and he would do his best to take her so that I could get a 2-3 hour nap in every day.  Getting out of the house at least once a day to enjoy the sunshine and some fresh air has done wonders as well–I can’t imagine what kind of a wreck I would have been if I was cooped up in our apartment every single day.  And lastly, I had to constantly remind myself even during the crying fits and the discomfort and the sleeplessness that I had wanted and dreamed about having Sirena for so many years and that I needed to appreciate the little life that I was fortunate enough to spend my days with, even during the rough patches.

Each day has honestly gotten better and better and even though we’re now approaching her one month birthday and I’m still exhausted, even though I still question whether or not I know what the heck I’m doing, and even though I still cry at the drop of a dime, I know that this is all temporary and that this will all be over before we know it so I strive to enjoy each and every moment I have with her as much as possible.

Our little burrito

A baby story: Week 35

Week 35: Baby’s the size of a coconut!

The weeks seem to be zooooming by now that we’re getting so much closer to the due date!  A LOT has taken place in the last week and it feels good to be getting so many things done in the baby department. But before I get to that I just need to shout at the top of my lungs that I AM OFFICIALLY DONE WITH STUDENT TEACHING!  Friday was my last day with those 7th grade knuckleheads and although it’s completely bittersweet since I enjoyed my time with them so much, it is such a major relief to be done and only have to work full-time for the next few weeks.  😉  I want to write a post reflecting on my experience once my credential course and my CA state assessment are done (should be all finished up with everything next week) so I’ll leave it at that for now.

This week Kevin and I did some major work on the baby’s room and it’s coming together quite nicely!  The fire was under our rears because our Bay Area shower was being hosted at our apartment so we worked from early morning hours both Saturday and Sunday to get the room and the entire apartment in tip-top shape.  We’ve still got some work to do on the baby’s room but we are almost done!  Here are some sneak peek photos of our progress so far:

Mars relaxing in the glider we got from Craig’s List!  We’re going to dye the fabric a dark brown but this is what we’ve got for now.

Here is a little something I made for her–a picture of our very first ultrasound at 8 weeks (seems like a lifetime ago!) with the words “Love at first sight” written on the bottom.

The top of her dresser/changing table with another plant, her mermaid candle holder from my mom, an art print of a bear + constellation, a little mermaid finger puppet from Jenny and Neil, her first spoon with a little mermaid on it, and last but certainly not least–a framed picture of her big sister Lola!

We went to IKEA and purchased two bookshelves to begin her little library.  Here are some shots of some of the shelves:

The top of the bookshelf with some flowers, her cute little Vans shoes (courtesy of Kim and baby Amelia!), her Ariel doll (one of four Disney dolls my Aunt Tina got us for our shower last week!), and a mirror I purchased years ago at an antique store

So many good books!!

Two of the shelves with a Peter Pan pop-up book that mama and daddy bought for her months ago sitting atop a stack of children’s story/song records from the 60s we scored for cheap during our babymoon, and the second shelf has her Shel Silverstein book collection (we received Where the Sidewalk Ends from her Aunt Judith, A Light in the Attic from Jayme, and The Missing Piece Meets the Big O from Kim, Frank and Amelia) and two cute teddy bears (one from Steve and one from Brianne and Brian wearing a cute little hat from Lisa and Josh)!

She’s already got a shelf dedicated to her bilingual English/Spanish books!  I only told one person that I wanted to get some bilingual books but quite a few people thought of it on their own and I am so happy they did!  Kevin’s looking forward to practicing his Spanish with her too.

We had a great time at our Bay Area shower and we can’t thank Carleigh enough for throwing such a fun party for us!  We had around 17 people there total and Lola and Mars were the perfect hosts.  🙂  My mom and her boyfriend Steve crashed the party and surprised us that afternoon, here’s a link to a fun video she put together of their sneaky plan to surprise us. And here are some photos from the afternoon (courtesy of my mama):

One of the games Carleigh had the guests play, they had to create a baby out of Play-Doh and I chose the one that I liked the best! Some very interesting creations here…

The pink one on the bottom is the one I chose (Carleigh’s)!

Second and third place winners for the other shower game

Me and Kevin opening up some gifts. We were reading a super sweet poem written by our friends Terri and Scott that was inscribed in the inside cover of the book.

Some of the party guests + doggies

Family photo!

Tonight I was treated to an amazing prenatal massage and it was so appreciated.  Our doula is a massage therapist and I had been looking forward to this massage for weeks! This one was included in our package we got from her and my mama bought me a few more to take advantage of before and after the little miss arrives.  THANK YOU mama!  It was beyond relaxing and I feel like I’m on cloud nine right now.  🙂

And last but certainly not least today we had our 36 week prenatal appointment.  It was a little stressful because our OB/GYN’s office called me yesterday afternoon letting me know that she was cancelling all appointments for the rest of the week, including ours.  Kevin and I had been looking forward to seeing her one last time today and I was definitely upset by the news.  Luckily this morning I was called with some good news, that another OB/GYN had an opening to see us at 11:30 so we were able to have our appointment after all!  The doctor was able to confirm that Sirena’s head is down (woohoo!) and although the ultrasound was short and sweet, we were so happy to see her little arms and fingers and long legs stretching out.  The funniest thing was that the doctor could tell that her bladder was full, haha.  The picture we got wasn’t the best but I thought I’d put it here anyways just for posterity’s sake.  🙂  This is a picture of her pretty lil’ head:

The doctor said her head is nice ‘n round!

Belly shots!

She is definitely groooowing!

Can you tell how much more relaxed I am after my prenatal massage? Ahhh…

The best Lola photo bomb to date!

Other pregnancy updates

  • Total weight gained so far: 13 pounds
  • Number of baby-related classes/appointments we have this weekend: Four! Friday we’re meeting with the Labor & Delivery team to ask questions and get a sneak-peek as to which resident doctor might deliver this little munchkin, Saturday we’ve got a Newborn Care Class at Kaiser and we’re meeting with our doula again, and Sunday I’m going to an event where mamas get together to share positive birth stories which I’m really looking forward to.
  • Fun baby developments this week: She measures around 20 inches now and weighs a little over 5 pounds.  At this point she probably won’t grow much longer so all of her attention will be focused on packing on the pounds! Her kidneys and her sense of hearing are fully developed and at this point all she’s got left to do is allow her lungs to mature.

City life + swingin’ in the trees

This past weekend Kevin, Lola and I had a completely free schedule so we took full advantage of it.  We drove into the city on Saturday to enjoy what we thought was going to be a super sunny, warm day…

View of the Ferry Building from the Bay Bridge…it was such a clear day, you rarely see this view with such clarity going over the bridge!

Lola anxious to get to our destination

View of the Ferry Building from Embarcadero

Our first destination was North Beach–I still have a SF library card (shh, don’t tell them we moved to Oakland) and so I reserved some pregnancy/childbirth books to pick up at the North Beach branch since it’s so close to work and they were ready for pick up so we figured we’d stop there first to check ’em out.  Then we decided to take full advantage of our location to enjoy some yummy Italian food for lunch.

Kevin enjoying some major sunshine at Caffe Delucchi

Some graffiti art around North Beach

We then decided to treat Lola to a visit to our old stomping grounds…Golden Gate Park!  To our surprise, though, by the time we got to that part of the city the weather had completely changed.  It went from sunny and warm to cold, foggy, and rainy!  Even though we lived in the city for 2 years and experienced this on a number of occasions we still couldn’t get over the fact that a 15 minute drive could get us to what seemed like a completely different part of the country.  We tried to make the best of it though to get Lola some much-needed and well-deserved exercise!

The tip top of the dome of the Conservatory of Flowers

Thar she blows!  Not too shabby of a background for our rendezvous in the park.

Lola’s newest obsession?  Frisbee!  We love the Kong frisbee, it is the absolute best for a sharp-toothed dog like Lola.

Kevin getting a good throw in

Lola being a good girl and bringing it back to us (about 85% of the time, anyways!)

The next day we made a trip to Albany Hill Park to do some exploring on this hill that we had seen numerous times driving around North Berkeley/Albany/El Cerrito/Richmond…it was about time we made a trip up the hill and we are so glad we did!

Be-a-u-tiful eucalyptus trees!

The view from the east side of the hill (I forgot to take a picture of the view of the bay from the other side of the hill)

To our delight, we found a tree swing just hanging out and begging for Kevin to give it a whirl!  He spent a good 15 minutes swinging on that thing and Lola’s reaction to him swinging was so perfect, I caught a couple of hilarious videos for your viewing pleasure!

Kevin up among the trees (and Lola below, freaking out)

Lola attempting to bite Kevin’s ankle upon landing, hahah.

Kevin about to give me a good whack in the face (and Lola trailing behind)…I love this photo.

Lola about to get smacked in the face by Kevin’s big ol’ feet!  I’m surprised she didn’t get hit the whole time they did this.

And here are the videos! Here’s the first time Kevin attempted the tree swing and Lola’s initial reaction to all the action. Here’s another video of Kevin dodging Lola’s attempts to bring him down from the rope swing.  And here’s a quick video of Lola versus the rope swing.

The result of Lola’s battle with the rope swing?…

…one very sleepy pup.

Winter weekends

We’ve been trying to maintain the “adventures” part of the blog’s name as much as possible, I’ve just been slacking on updating about it here.  Here are some fun things we did in February…

I joined Carleigh and Scott for an evening of live theater at Albany High School (just north of Berkeley) to see “The Drowsy Chaperone”, a musical comedy.  Carleigh and I were both active in theater when we were in high school and it was fun being a community member out supporting a local high school’s musical.  It sure brought back a lot of memories for us!

The lobby of the theater

The gorgeously decorated theater

Me being a dork in front of a King Kong mural inside the theater

My theater mates!

The very cute theater (soooo much smaller than our high school’s!)

The finale!

On a bright and sunny weekend Kevin, Lola and I took a long walk through our neighborhood to do some exploring.  It ended up being a 3 mile walk round trip and our final destination was the Oakland Municipal Rose Garden which all you horticulturalists out there probably already know that it wasn’t in bloom this time of year but it still made for a nice walk through the grounds.  We want to return after Mother’s Day which is when they say the roses really start popping.

One of the many neighborhood staircases we climbed to get to the park

Just about the only rose petals we saw that day

The grounds include a beautiful pool and lots of trails

Here’s a shot of the beautiful Lake Merritt which we live just a couple of blocks away from

I honestly cannot get over how gorgeous this lake is and how lucky we are to live so close to it!

See the little gnome?  These little guys have been popping up around the neighborhood for the past few months…they’re hand-painted and nailed to the bottom of telephone poles.  I don’t know who’s behind all of this nonsense but I sure am a fan!

On Superbowl Sunday, my favorite holiday of the year (can you sense the sarcasm of my typing voice here?), we made the trek across the bridge to our old stomping grounds: San Francisco!  It’s amazing how little we get out to the city now that we live in Oakland (only 20 minutes drive from SF with no traffic, though, so really not too far at all).  I’m there too often for work so when it comes to the weekend it’s the last place I want to drive to, unfortunately.  But this particular Sunday we had an excuse…a Superbowl party hosted by our friend Darinee!  We arrived pretty early so decided to spend some time reading and relaxing at Alta Plaza Park in Pacific Heights.

Cherry blossoms in full bloom!  So, so pretty.

We saw this mirror in the park that was installed by The SF Mirrors Project (a really cool public art project, check out the website for more info) and Kevin wanted to take a picture of me in front of it (with a wee little baby bump!)

Views from the top of the park…

And last but not least, this past weekend we spent a glorious Sunday morning hiking in Tilden Park in Berkeley with our friends Terri and Scott and their pups Madeira and Ihna.  The only other time we had been to Tilden was our first weekend in the East Bay for 4th of July weekend when we went swimming in Lake Anza with Carleigh and Scott so we were overdue for a trip back there!

The windy drive to Inspiration Point where we were meeting the gang…Lola enjoying the ride sniffing out the window!

The group making our way up…

…and up and up…

To be rewarded with a beautiful 360 view of the SF Bay and surrounding areas!

We took a little break at the top of the peak to let the dogs rest (oh who am I kidding…it was to let the humans rest!)

Madeira, Terri, Ihna and Lola

Doggies and humans

Kevin getting smothered with Ihna kisses (I swear those two were married in a past life)

Teri and Scott keeping me entertained!

The whole gang!

Lola’s obligatory leaping shot

Madeira looking all majestic at the top of the peak

Lola, looking like she’s in on some inside joke (photo courtesy of Scott)

For some reason I thought these towers looked really neat on the way back down the hill…don’t ask.

Day trip to Albany Bulb

Kevin, Lola and I took advantage of a clear, warm, sunny day to make a day trip to the Albany Bulb (just northwest of Berkeley, right on the bay).  It’s a former landfill (go figure) which is now home to an awesome dog beach, some nice walking trails, and lots of awesome graffiti art to look at.

Kevin and Lola’s favorite past time: playing fetch in the open water

Lola swimming in the bay (see the kayaker and the city skyline in the background?)

Soaking wet dog

This was a memorial of Miss Daisy painted on a rock overlooking the dog beach.  So sweet!

After Lola’s dip in the bay, we took a 30 minute walk to check out the graffiti art and the views of the city skyline.

Me, Lola and the baby bump

Kevin always likes climbing down on unstable rocks/ledges…

…and Lola always follows after him!

Follow the leader

See the giant deli sandwich to the right?  And notice all of the random shoes hanging from the branches?

Lola’s new apartment

Kevin wondering if this note “Not a white man’s b****” was meant for him.

The trails went on and on but with my pregnant self I could only go so far before we had to turn back.  There is so much to explore here!

Cities that start with an “S”

In mid-January I visited three cities that start with an “S” within a week’s time–San Diego, San Francisco, and Sausalito.

I went to San Diego for work a few weeks ago for an amazing (can you sense my sarcasm here?) three-day training at our San Diego campus.  The best part of it all was that I was able to make a quick visit with my good friend Heather, her husband Steven, and their adorable pup Jack since they live so close to where I was staying.  Heather picked me up after work and she made us an amazing vegetarian dinner which was enjoyed while telling stories about what’s going on in our lives (she’s a runner and a blogger too!) and commiserating over working at universities.  😉

The best part of the visit (just don’t tell Heather and Steven)?!  Getting to spend some time with Jack!  I met him a couple of years ago and he was just a little rascal then and it was great seeing him in person after following his blog for all this time.  I didn’t realize how small he was, he always seems bigger in pictures (he’s just about the same size as Lola) and he is such a sweet dog!  We’re hoping to get him and Lola together in the nearish future…they would have so much fun together!

Check out those ears! And yes, one of them is always folded over to the side…so cute!

Kevin’s mom Dorothy and his sister Judith came up the following weekend for a visit (and to be present at our 20 week ultrasound!) and we visited two cities that start with an “S” together.  We were only in San Francisco for a couple of hours but those hours were well spent…we went to Zante’s for Indian pizza at the request of Judith who had never been there but heard such good things from my dad-in-law George.  Even though I didn’t take any photos during our shotgun trip across the bridge I can confidently say that we made another Indian pizza convert out of an Edmonds!  🙂

The last city on our tour was Sausalito.  We hadn’t been there since January two years prior when Kevin’s brother Thomas and our nephew Joshua came up for a visit so it was about time to make another trip up to Marin County to take a stroll along the coast.  It turned out to be a gorgeous day and we thoroughly enjoyed our time out in the sun with the yummy and refreshing sea breeze.

Beautiful day in the Bay!

I have like 15 of these candid photos of Kevin…I should make a slideshow of them all, what do you think?? Hehe.

Kevin, Lola and a sea lion statue.

Judith, Dorothy and the San Francisco skyline in the background…it was such a clear day!

Lola spotted ’em first…she’s thinking “C’mon, Dad, let me at ’em!”…

Kevin, Judith and Dorothy trying to get a good look at ’em too…

What exactly were we looking at?

Sea lions!

Relaxing in the sunshine

We ended the day getting some ice cream (or sherbert, if your name is Kevin) and eating it in the sunshine.  Here’s a fun animated slideshow of Kevin and Lola…check out her eagle eyes on that sherbert of Kevin’s!

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